New Zealand Declared “Best Place to Have Herpes,” Tourism Board Accepts Award with a Cold Sore and a Smile

(Worthy Satire) – In a stunning blow to Paris, Bali, and that one pharmacy in Tijuana, New Zealand has officially been crowned the “Best Place to Have Herpes,” thanks to a cheeky public health ad that has now gone viral — in more ways than one.

The award-winning campaign, funded by the New Zealand Sexual Health Authority (NZSHA), features beaming Kiwis frolicking through lush landscapes, climbing glaciers, and sharing awkward STI disclosures over flat whites. The slogan? “If you’re going to get herpes, get it somewhere beautiful.”

Critics called the campaign “insensitive,” “hilarious,” and “shockingly relatable,” while Tourism New Zealand immediately adopted it as their secondary slogan, replacing 100% Pure with 100% Positive (HSV-2).

NZSHA spokesperson Dr. Poppy Hives defended the campaign: “We just wanted to destigmatize herpes and boost tourism. And if we can do both with one itchy, beautiful ad, why not?”

The award ceremony was held in Geneva, where New Zealand representatives were presented with a golden blister-shaped trophy. Australia responded by launching their own campaign: “At least you didn’t get it in Perth.”

Rumors are swirling that Iceland, jealous of the win, is preparing a counter-ad: “Our volcanoes aren’t the only thing that occasionally erupts.”

Meanwhile, herpes sufferers worldwide are reportedly Googling flight deals to Auckland — because if you’re going to flare up, it might as well be with a view of the Southern Alps.

Worthy Satire is meant purely for comedic purposes—after all, as Proverbs reminds us, “Laughter is good medicine.” But behind every satire is a real story, video, or event. For the unspun version of the headline, be sure to check out the original source. [ Source of the Satire (Read More…) ]

💡 Did you know? Worthy Satire survives on likes, comments, and shares. Shocking, we know.

📢 Every 👍 click, 💬 quip, and 🔄 repost confuses the algorithms into thinking we’re important — and helps this comical piece travel a little further. 🙌

💬 Discuss this on our forums
Fauci Hearing Paused After Record Gets Stuck on “The Fifth”
A Senate hearing descended into confusion Wednesday after lawmakers discovered that Dr. Anthony Fauci’s testimony was apparently being played from...

Astronomers Discover Sugar Between the Stars, Confirm Universe Has a Sweet Tooth
Astronomers announced this week that they have discovered sugar molecules drifting through the vast darkness between stars, confirming what children...

AI Agents Enroll in College, Finish Degrees Before Students Find the Syllabus
Analysts say artificial intelligence may accelerate the expected wave of college closures, but the real disruption reportedly began when AI...

NBC News Issues Trigger Warning Before Accidentally Reporting Fact
In a stunning act of journalistic caution, NBC News reportedly issued a trigger warning before quoting the phrase “biological male”...

Texas Democrats Launch Bold New Campaign Slogan: “We’re All Going to Hell!”
In a stirring display of political enthusiasm, Texas Democrats reportedly rallied behind Senate candidate James Talarico by chanting, “We’re all...

Nearly 100 Monkeys Escape Enclosure, Neighbors Mistake It for Emergency Session of Congress
A quiet neighborhood was thrown into absolute banana-scented confusion this week after nearly 100 monkeys escaped their enclosure and began...

Britons Ordered To Remove Air Conditioning From Homes During 40°C Heat Because Net Zero Now Includes Net Comfort
In a bold new effort to save the planet one perspiring homeowner at a time, British officials have reportedly ordered...