WASHINGTON D.C. (Worthy Satire) – In a stunning reversal of traditional economic policy discussions, President Donald Trump lashed out at Federal Reserve Chair Jerome Powell, calling him a “fool” but admitting he enjoys using Powell as a verbal punching bag on social media.
“I think he’s a fool, okay? But he’s my fool,” Trump said in a statement, adding, “You know, I love mean tweeting him. He’s got that perfect face for it – like a sad, confused accountant who lost your tax refund in the Bermuda Triangle.”
Powell, who was seen pacing nervously in the Federal Reserve cafeteria clutching a half-empty cup of decaf, appeared visibly distressed. Eyewitnesses say he was muttering to himself while staring blankly at a stale bagel, repeating, “I knew I should have gone with a career in interpretive dance.”
Sources close to Powell claim he’s been practicing expressive movements in his office, attempting to convey economic uncertainty through interpretive dance routines titled “Quantitative Easing” and “The Rate Hike Waltz.”
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