Iran Claims Missile Strike on Mossad HQ, But Experts Say “No Worries—All the Agents Are Already in Iran”

(Worthy Satire) – In a dramatic announcement on state television, Iranian officials declared they had successfully launched a precision missile strike on what they identified as the “main headquarters of the Zionist Mossad”. The celebratory broadcast included grainy footage of what appeared to be a warehouse in the Negev Desert collapsing in a cloud of dust.

However, security analysts around the world greeted the news with a collective shrug.

“There’s really no strategic loss here,” said one Israeli intelligence source, speaking on condition of anonymity while sipping espresso in a Tehran café. “Frankly, most of the Mossad’s workforce is already embedded in Iran—running kebab shops, driving taxis, and apparently, directing the next season of Tehran.”

Iran’s Revolutionary Guard proudly displayed wreckage from the missile strike, claiming it as proof of their military’s technological prowess. Critics, however, pointed out that the footage looked suspiciously like recycled clips from a failed rocket test and an old episode of MacGyver.

Meanwhile, reports surfaced that the alleged Mossad HQ targeted by Iran was actually a decoy facility, primarily used for storing outdated fax machines and a single 1998 Pentium desktop.

“This is like hitting a scarecrow and declaring victory in battle,” remarked a Western diplomat. “But hey, if it makes them feel better, who are we to argue?”

In related news, Israeli officials have reportedly ordered extra shawarma supplies in downtown Tehran, citing “operational needs.”

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