PALM BEACH, FL (Worthy Satire) – President Donald Trump stunned attendees at a recent Mar-a-Lago fundraiser when he shared a little-known secret to business success: the “fat shot drug.”
“I know a guy, a very very very top guy,” Trump said, gesturing wildly. “You all know him. Highly neurotic. Seriously overweight. But brilliant. And you know what? He’s on the fat shot drug. Bigly successful. Biggest dealmaker. The fattest deals. Huge.”
Trump hinted that the mysterious drug, which he referred to as “basically a miracle in a syringe,” could soon become a staple of the MAGA diet. “We’re going to make America slim again. It’s gonna be yuge. Believe me.”