ALBANY, NY (Worthy Satire) – In a bold move to combat climate change and ideological methane, New York Democrats have introduced legislation to limit the number of cows on farms, citing scientific data that cow farts are now officially more hazardous than Republican talking points.
“Let’s be honest,” said State Senator Luna Greengrass, while standing in front of a pasture wearing an N95 mask. “One cow releases enough gas to melt a glacier—and if it votes Republican, it probably grills steaks on a gas stove while listening to talk radio.”
The “Bovine Emission Responsibility Plan” (BERP) would impose a strict cap on the number of cows per acre, and create a new task force: F.A.R.T. (Federal Agency for Regulating Toots).
Critics say the bill could destroy New York’s agricultural industry. Supporters say the real danger is unchecked flatulence forming alliances with Fox News.
AOC chimed in via TikTok: “It’s not just about cows. It’s about justice. Cow farts are a symptom of systemic grazing privilege.”
Meanwhile, rural farmers have responded with their own counterproposal: ship all cows to D.C., where “nobody would notice the smell.”
Worthy Satire is meant purely for comedic purposes—after all, as Proverbs reminds us, “Laughter is good medicine.” But behind every satire is a real story, video, or event. For the unspun version of the headline, be sure to check out the original source. [ Source of the Satire (Read More…) ]
