Hell Freezes: Hillary Praises Trump, Eyes Peace Prize and Pardon

(Worthy Satire) – In a development so shocking meteorologists are scrambling to update the seven-day forecast for Hades, Hillary Clinton has publicly declared that President Trump has been “great” and went so far as to suggest he should be nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize.

While stunned onlookers wondered if Hillary had finally slipped into an alternate dimension, sources close to the former Secretary of State whispered that her sudden change of heart may be less about peace — and more about parole.

Facing a potential cocktail of investigations, indictments, and a prison cell with fewer amenities than Chappaqua, Hillary’s glowing remarks about her former nemesis are being read as a not-so-subtle plea for presidential clemency. “She’s basically offering the Nobel nomination as a down payment on a pardon,” quipped one Capitol Hill staffer.

Trump, for his part, appeared bemused. “Hillary saying nice things about me proves what I’ve always said — I can make deals nobody thought possible. Even the Devil is jealous of this one,” he told reporters.

Meanwhile, theologians confirmed reports of ice forming in the deepest recesses of Hell. Climate activists are already drafting a lawsuit against Clinton, blaming her for the sudden temperature drop.

As one political analyst summed it up: “This isn’t bipartisanship. It’s survival instinct dressed in a pantsuit.”

Worthy Satire is meant purely for comedic purposes—after all, as Proverbs reminds us, “Laughter is good medicine.” But behind every satire is a real story, video, or event. For the unspun version of the headline, be sure to check out the original source. [ Source of the Satire (Read More…) ]

💡 Did you know? Worthy Satire survives on likes, comments, and shares. Shocking, we know.

📢 Every 👍 click, 💬 quip, and 🔄 repost confuses the algorithms into thinking we’re important — and helps this comical piece travel a little further. 🙌

💬 Discuss this on our forums
Trump ‘Re-Pardons’ Biden Turkeys After Autopen Scandal — Floats Naming New Birds ‘Chuck and Nancy’
In a ceremony that instantly became the strangest constitutional moment involving poultry, President Donald Trump announced Tuesday that he had...

$500 Million in Food Stamps Spent at Fast-Food Restaurants — America Enters the Golden Age of Government-Funded Grease
In the latest sign that the nation is thriving—nutritionally, economically, and spiritually—Americans have spent $500 million in food stamps at...

Australian Prisoner Sues for His ‘Human Right’ to Eat Vegemite
In a legal drama that could only unfold in the land where kangaroos outnumber politicians with common sense, an Australian...

Thieves Steal $100M in Jewels from Louvre After Museum Uses ‘Louvre’ as Password
In what French officials are calling both “a tragedy and a teachable moment,” thieves made off with over $100 million...

Pelosi Announces Retirement From Congress, Wall Street Opens a Support Group for Traders Who Can’t Beat Her Portfolio
In a shocking development that rattled both Capitol Hill and the NASDAQ, Rep. Nancy Pelosi announced her retirement from Congress...

Penny Shortage Forces McDonald’s to “Round Down for Freedom”; Children’s Piggy Banks Declared Strategic Reserves
As America's penny shortage deepens, businesses from McDonald's to Mom-and-Pop diners are being forced to rethink how they make change...

Snickers Are Candy, Twix Are Groceries: America’s Halloween Tax Code Melts Under Pressure
In a nation divided on nearly everything, there’s one debate that truly exposes the cracks in our civilization: Is a...