(Worthy Satire) – Democrats across America were left in collective disarray this week as footage emerged of tens of thousands of Israelis cheering for U.S. President Donald Trump — the very man they had spent years branding as “literally Hitler.”
The spectacle, which took place in Jerusalem’s Knesset and across the nation following the Gaza peace deal, has reportedly sent several D.C. think tanks into emergency therapy sessions. “We just don’t understand,” said one unnamed progressive analyst. “How could the Jewish people — the victims of Hitler — be applauding Hitler?”
Meanwhile in Tel Aviv, Israelis were seen waving Trump banners and blowing shofars in celebration of the ceasefire and the return of hostages — an event that coincided with Hoshana Rabbah, the joyful seventh day of Tabernacles.
“It’s almost like they see him as a friend of Israel or something,” said one bewildered MSNBC commentator. “We tried so hard to tell them he’s the second coming of fascism, but now he’s literally being welcomed like Cyrus the Great.”
In related news, campus protesters in the U.S. held candlelight vigils to mourn what they called “the death of nuance.” Some were later seen Googling “Where is Israel?” and “Why are Jews happy?”
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